The People Who Shape Us in Customer Success: Lessons from My Dad

Chad Horenfeldt
Aug 8
3 min read

Who are the people who helped you push through when things felt impossible? Who nudged you toward the path you’re on today?

In Customer Success, it’s easy to get caught up in the grind - the big wins, the painful losses, and everything in between. But sometimes, the best way to understand who we are (and how we keep going) is to look back at the people who shaped us.

For me, that reflection has been especially meaningful since my dad passed away. We didn’t always see eye to eye, but he influenced me far more than I realized. Many of the values and habits that make me effective in my career - and resilient in life - trace directly back to him.

The Rollercoaster of Customer Success

I used to tell new CSMs:

“This will be one of the most rewarding jobs you’ll ever have — and one of the toughest.”

One day, you’re the hero of the company. The next, a customer hits you with the dreaded “We’re not renewing.”

To survive those highs and lows, it helps to know where your grit comes from — and who taught it to you.

Who’s Been Your Guide?

Think about the people who’ve had the biggest impact on your career:

Who did you admire enough to emulate?
Who always had your back?
Who gave you advice you still lean on?
Who helped you discover your Customer Success superpower?

It might be a parent, a sibling, a mentor, a professor, or a former boss. Write down at least one name. Then ask yourself: What did they teach you?

Lessons from My Dad

Here are some of the ways my dad’s influence shows up in my work and life:

Look for the positives. My dad always said, “If you learn one new thing at a conference, it was worth going.” Set expectations wisely and find value in every situation.
Feed your clients. His old-school advice: “Take them to dinner — it’ll remind them of how their mother fed them.” Whether or not that’s true, those shared meals built trust, sparked laughter, and saved more than a few renewals.
Be personal. Pre-social media, my dad tracked birthdays and anniversaries in ACT! and called people without fail. Not a quick “HBD” — but with genuine energy and attention. I try to bring that same authenticity to my network today.
Use humor. His jokes? Terrible. His commitment to delivering them? Unshakable. I’ve used humor to break the tension with customers and teams more times than I can count.
Keep learning. Even in his 70s, he was taking social media classes to drum up real estate leads. My own lifelong learning habit — about 40 books a year — is from my dad's influence.
Stay skeptical. His go-to line when I quoted something from the news: “If it’s in the paper, it must be true.” It trained me to question sources and dig deeper.
Be helpful. Whether with personal favors or volunteering, he went the extra mile. I try to pay that forward through mentoring and hosting CS meetups. My book, The Strategic Customer Success Manager, has now become part of this.
Find a passion. For him, it was sailing. For me, it’s building communities and creating content. Passion fuels perseverance.
Push through adversity. Laid off in the ’90s, he reinvented himself in real estate. In his late 70s, he switched again and drove a school bus. He had his flaws, but he kept going — and so do I.
Stay true to your values. He refused to work on Jewish holidays, no matter the fallout. I’ve inherited that uncompromising stance on certain principles.
Set high standards.“Elbows off the table.” “Sit up straight.” “Don’t talk with your mouth full.” He was relentless — and so am I. The trick (still working on this) is knowing when “good enough” is enough.

My dad and I when he received an award for his volunteer work

Take a Moment — and Say Thanks

If you can, write down the name of someone who’s shaped you. Identify the traits you’ve adopted from them. And then — here’s the important part — tell them.

It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. A short message, a phone call, even a LinkedIn post can make someone’s day.

If they’re no longer here, honor them by passing those lessons forward.

Thanks, Dad.